The Self Help Elf

I like to read. Lucky, since my mother probably owns and continues to buy every book published in the history of the world. Every book, that is, published by Deseret Book, Covenant or any other publisher of church books by authors with names like Brent Yorgason, Chris Heimerdinger and various other importantly initialled people. Maybe it's BECAUSE of this that I learned to love to read. Whatever the reason, I have lovingly dubbed my mother The Self Help Elf because of the way she finds a book for almost every situation in life.

Before my brother and I entered adolescence and were still normal, well-behaved (right mom?), carefree children, we just got to hear fun stories. Except the time when I was 5 or 6 and apparently asked where babies come from, then found the book my mom had gotten from the library about it that she had intended to read to us herself. I got to it first. It was complete with pictures and all. LITTLE bit of a different genre than Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites.

But then I turned 12 and Christmas and birthdays started to include books with names like Braces, Pimples and Jr. High or something very similar to that. Every year there were new ones, the subjects becoming increasingly more serious. Before I turned 16 there were books about NOT dating. Then after 16 there were books about dating, but dating carefully (one that I can recall was Dating: no guts, no glory). I think MOST of the books in my collection came during that period of time.

Then after high school graduation there were books about college, living on my own, cookbooks and, for a change, books about dating in college. After I met Ryan and professed to be smitten with him and wanting to marry him at age 19, my father joined the ranks of Self Help Elf-ism. He gave me a book, which he picked out all by himself, called How do I Know if I'm Really in Love? Apparently the book had the desired effect because Ryan and I broke up instead of getting married. Then we got back together after China and I received from my mother First Comes Love. A really great book that goes ahead and assumes that you have read the above mentioned book (not by the same author), and have decided that you ARE in love and how to proceed from there. Great book. Ryan and I broke up again. Maybe because he got a book entitled Are You Sure You Don't Want to Date Other People? She's Almost the Only Person You've Dated Since You Returned From Your Mission. I wouldn't be surprised if that book really exists.

About a year later I received another book. Where Do I Go From Here? Does the title say enough about what my life was like at this point? Well, it was basically a "no, just because you're not married at 21 doesn't mean you SHOULD go on a mission. There ARE other options." Great book, but I DID decide to go on a mission, and so proceeded to receive all sorts of mission-themed books.

Skip to after the mission. Ryan and I decided to get married (true to our whole relationship, NO it wasn't that simple, but for the purposes of this post, we'll skip to that). At my wedding shower I got a whole huge basket of books (because obviously this would be the MOST complicated thing I've ever gotten myself into). Included in this basket were The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands (by Dr. Laura), Strangling Your Husband is not an Option, and The Five Love Languages, among many others. A couple of weeks later my mom gave me one that she had forgotten to include in the basket: And They Were Not Ashamed. My dad was standing there and as my mother passed me the book, he tried to wrestle it away from me because, according to him "she doesn't need this. She's a good girl." (Yes, the book is about sex) I think he wanted to give me another copy of How Do I Know if I'm Really in Love? Anyway, ALL of the books have been extremely helpful because, I have to say, the first year of marriage definitely had it's difficult points and both of us learned a lot from various things in these books (although none of them instructed a husband as to how to proceed if his wife throws a block of cheese at him :)

Six months later I was pregnant. True to form, at the baby shower I got another basket of books, including What to Expect When You're Expecting, and other good reads on "forming your own family."

After Ty was born there were What to expect the first years, and the wonderful Jackrabbit Factor and Hidden Treasures. Some people go to therapists for help. I read. Education on ANY subject, is ALWAYS a good investment.

My question now is, what books do I need for the second time around?